Each step I take...

Sitting here with all these thoughts running madly throughout my head has been driving me insane. Talking to friends doesn't seem to help much either. I just do not know which way to go, which way to step. My mind has been divided, one wanting to stay, the other looking for something else. Both make sense, so what do I do? I don't want to waste anyone's time, but I'm afraid of being wrong. What if this is it? What if this is as good as it gets for me?
What if I say those words, will he be able to not hate me. I don't want to hurt him, not in the slightest. But I can't help thinking that this isn't quite it.
What I am hoping is that these feelings go and never look back, that they never return again. I want to feel like I have it, I have it all. But I could live without is what is damaging me.
Familiarity is what I think is keeping me around. But it could be a tough place that I can pull out of. I need time to think, but I would rather just stop thinking, for now at least.